Best mall ninja knife

Joined
Dec 23, 2008
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334
This is a light-hearted inquiry. :p

If you were a mall ninja (and, yes, I know you aren't, but if you were), what one knife would you want to fulfill yourself?

I'm not entirely sure what a mall ninja is, though I guess it's some youthful guy who is into weapons that he would never use (and never have occasion to use) in real life.

In any event, your responses will give me a better idea of what it takes to achieve one's inner mall ninja :D.

And let me say in advance that if someone mentions your favorite knife, that doesn't mean it's not a great knife. Mall ninjas, I am sure, appreciate great cutlery too.
 
Boker Jim Wagner. It doesn't have an uber steel, but that's what I'd pick if I were a mall ninja ;)
 
Mantis, baby- all the way. That's what they're all about.
Yes, yes indeed.
+1 On that too.

However, these things, IMO, are the epitome of Ninjary.

Go in peace.
knifemaster.jpg
 
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Cold Steel 6" Ti-Lite. What's cooler than, when someone's bullying you around, you whip out a six-inch knife open in the blink of an eye? You could hold it with both hands and do D20 damage!

I just really don't see a purpose for such a large folder.
 
The Cold Steel Magnum Tanto in San Mai III has traditionally been the "classic" mall ninja knife, although some of the things mentioned above (Dark Ops in particular) are worthy competitors.

If you don't know what a "mall ninja" is, you owe it to yourself to Google that phrase and go to "Shrine of the Mall Ninja." Which details the legendary exploits of gecko45.
 
Cold Steel 6" Ti-Lite. What's cooler than, when someone's bullying you around, you whip out a six-inch knife open in the blink of an eye? You could hold it with both hands and do D20 damage!

I just really don't see a purpose for such a large folder.

Short sword should be D6, no? ^^
 
Yeah, but in a mall ninja's mind, it's right up there in the 20s.

Toss in a kunai (for example, see Cold Steel Battle Ring) and a Naruto headband and now we're talking. DATTEBAYO.

...I feel dirty for carrying this knowledge.
 
Actually that all depends on the difficulty roll :p
 
The Cold Steel Magnum Tanto in San Mai III has traditionally been the "classic" mall ninja knife

HEY! I like that knife LOL. It was one of the first knives of any qaulity I got when I was like 13. I was so proud of that thing. The guy at the knife counter even spun it on it's side to show me that it would spin nearly forever to illustrate it's perfect balance.
 
Striders aren't Mall Ninja knives, they're Armchair Commando knives. Mall Ninjas can't afford Striders.
 
I always thought the CS AK-47 looked pretty mall ninja-ish.
 
MOD? Or would this be more of an armchair commando knife?

"Tactical" folding knives with any grade of stainless steel (from 420j2 to s30v) with any type of black coating are mall ninja knives in my book. "It's to reduce glare..." Right, so the enemy can't see you opening your bag of Doritoes.

Any knife with tiger stripe coating is mall ninja.

Any knife with digital camo anywhere is mall ninja.
 
"Tactical" folding knives with any grade of stainless steel (from 420j2 to s30v) with any type of black coating are mall ninja knives in my book. "It's to reduce glare..." Right, so the enemy can't see you opening your bag of Doritoes.
Thats funny, I don't care who you are reading that, its funny.:p:D:thumbup:
 
Something you guys are forgetting, Mall Ninjas are notoriously cheap because a) they're still in Middle School, b) they're 40 years old, unemployed, and live in their mom's basement, or c) shopping malls pay their Ninjas very poorly.

So Dark Ops, Strider, and 'high end' brands are ruled out. :D

Here's my vote. It may be ugly and useless, but at least it's dangerous too:

MW2.jpg
 
Here's my vote. It may be ugly and useless, but at least it's dangerous too:

MW2.jpg

Lolz. Wut? :confused: What is that thing supposed to be? That thing's so tactical, it doesn't even have a handle. The skillful mall ninja wields it with HIS MIND.
 
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