Fiskars Machete Axe

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Oct 28, 2005
Messages
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They do include the word axe. I refuse to clear brush, but would really like to see a member's review.

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It’s funny to read such universal agreement. I saw a guy at the end of my street using one of these things, and it didn’t look very graceful or effective.

I sometimes wonder if companies make something like this just for the sake of making something different and grab uninformed dollars.
 
It was made by a designer who clearly had "design chops" but zero field experience with the tool class. Very polished and technically-executed but based in a very "academic" (in the worst sense of the word) understanding of machetes and chopping tools. I recall seeing an interview with him where he went into great detail about what all the design elements were intended to confer to the user but I could have spent two hours explaining to him in detail why none of those things made sense and didn't work that way. But if you read what he wrote in a textbook on modern design it would have sounded good.
 
EngrSorenson said:
It’s funny to read such universal agreement. I saw a guy at the end of my street using one of these things, and it didn’t look very graceful or effective.

I sometimes wonder if companies make something like this just for the sake of making something different and grab uninformed dollars.
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Designed to appeal to the inexperienced techno-cool crowd. It should be a raving success.
 
It’s a symbolic machete, representing the impersonal and unfeeling sweep of fate against the struggling saplings reaching for the enlightening sun.

The holes in the machete induce turbulence, slowing the providential slice imperceptibly, yet inevitably.

Moral #1 for the saplings is that things right now are not quite as bad as they could be, absent the holes and the turbulence.

Moral #2 is that the sweep will move on, seeking other helpless victims in its cruel advance, thus granting any particular sapling stub a respite and recovery period to gird up the remaining cambium and see how far it can grow before the next implacable sweep reduces it again.

Parker
 
catspa said:
It’s a symbolic machete, representing the impersonal and unfeeling sweep of fate against the struggling saplings reaching for the enlightening sun.

The holes in the machete induce turbulence, slowing the providential slice imperceptibly, yet inevitably.

Moral #1 for the saplings is that things right now are not quite as bad as they could be, absent the holes and the turbulence.

Moral #2 is that the sweep will move on, seeking other helpless victims in its cruel advance, thus granting any particular sapling stub a respite and recovery period to gird up the remaining cambium and see how far it can grow before the next implacable sweep reduces it again.

Parker
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I’m not sure what you’re getting at here Parker, but it sounds Biblical and I feel like I’m about to learn something deep about the world spiritually from this… unique… cutting tool.
 
It’s actually a sarcastic parody of fluffy woke feeling-speak. Sorry to burst your bubble…

Parker, realizing that inanimate objects hate it when we anthropomorphise them
 
This tool is just flat out weird. I'm sure it'll sell to those that wouldn't know a nice tool if it bit em. Not for me.
Next Fiskar I buy will be one of their axes.
 
Doc Brown imagined the Flux Capacitor because he hit his head on a sink after falling off a toilet while trying to hang a clock in his bathroom.

I wonder what the creator of the Machete Axe hit their head on.
 
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