Silly Knife Names Thread

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EDCanAdamas

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Sep 8, 2013
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I was reading another thread and someone here suggested the "Svord Peasant" as the proper knife to fill a role. Which set me to thinking, why would you call your knife "Peasant" (Yeah, I get that it is probably what the peasants traditionally used when farming)? Why would you want to carry a knife that suggests that you are poor?

There are other silly names out there too, and our friends in the knife industry seem all too willing to provide them. Here are some:
From Gerber: Mini Swagger (small-man syndrome anyone?) Myth, Ghoststrike
From Benchmade: HK "Dispatch", Loco, Valet (Driving other guys cars?)

I'll think of some more later. This thread is supposed to be funny so keep it light. All brands and names are open for jokes/comments/laughs. Have at it.:D
 
EDCanAdamas said:
This thread is supposed to be funny so keep it light. All brands and names are open for jokes/comments/laughs. Have at it.:D
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Well you can pretty much just take a look at the TOPS Knives catalog... My favorites are the California Cobra, and the Grim Ripper.
 
Any Model 1 or name like that suggest the knifemaker has no imagination... There is tons of names one can think of besides that, yes you might make a hell of a knife but why not add unique ness to it with a original name:D
 
The primary and original definition of valet is "a man's personal servant." For a modernized gentleman's folder that makes a bit more sense than "dude who parks cars."
 
TOPS:
-Baghdad Box Cutter
-Cockpit Commander
-Devil's Elbow
-Black Heat
-Bartender Defender
-Devil's Claw
-Hunter of Gunmen
-Iraq Jac Joint Aggravation Tool
-Nit Picker
-Lion's Toothpick

Strangely, TOPS makes a good product...but their names are laughable. :D
 
rio said:
Any Model 1 or name like that suggest the knifemaker has no imagination... There is tons of names one can think of besides that, yes you might make a hell of a knife but why not add unique ness to it with a original name:D
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Yeah! Like Randalls! :D No imagination at all!
 
I recently named one of my designs "Carolina Phat Boy".... For some reason when I looked at it that name just came to mind... Kind of short and stubby with a fair sized middle section...
 
rio said:
Any Model 1 or name like that suggest the knifemaker has no imagination... There is tons of names one can think of besides that, yes you might make a hell of a knife but why not add unique ness to it with a original name:D
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I prefer that actually. I can't stand the names makers give their knives. I wish my Spyderco military was model 423 or something than to have a knife called "military" in my pocket. Any tacticool name is idiotic.

There's a maker out their that names his knives "particle accelerator" and stuff like that. First time I was turned off by the name of knives was by this maker. Even though it has no bearing on the knife, it still bugged me.
 
My vote is the Vulture 'Cholera'. Vulture? Whatever, fine. But why would you name your knife after a disease known as 'the shitting sickness' by Native Americans? What redeeming qualities does Cholera possess? How about 'Syphilis'? The Vulture 'Gonorrhea'? 'Leprosy'?

EDIT: 'Peasant' brings to mind a strong work ethic, toughness. I'd want a 'Peasant' blade before some idle 'Aristocrat'. The Aristocrat sits in the safe, I suppose, while the Peasant does all the recycling.
 
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Esav Benyamin said:
What if my grandparents were kulaks?
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Kulak would be actually be great name for an eastern European style knife, possibly to go along some other Russian/Soviet themed names like "Cossack", "Proletarian", "Bolshevik", and "Menshevik". Further elaborating, the "Cossack" would have a longer blade like the ZT 452 does and the "Kulak" would be a cross between a Sod Buster and one of the 1890s SAK soldier models.
 
Shotgun said:
There's a maker out their that names his knives "particle accelerator" and stuff like that. First time I was turned off by the name of knives was by this maker. Even though it has no bearing on the knife, it still bugged me.
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So you wouldn't be down with naming a knife "Flux Capacitor"?
 
QRTRMSTR: Mr. Roper, Marty McFly, Boss Hog, Spicoli, Doc Brown, B.A. Baracas, General Lee.... I love classic TV and 80's movies as much as the next guy but not as knife names....
 
eschwebach said:
QRTRMSTR: Mr. Roper, Marty McFly, Boss Hog, Spicoli, Doc Brown, B.A. Baracas, General Lee.... I love classic TV and 80's movies as much as the next guy but not as knife names....
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Plus, they probably paid zero royalties to use those names knowing QTRMATR...

My vote goes for any knife that sounds like it's going to be used as a murder weapon; microtech DOC being a good example. Another is a "homicide"... Really a custom knife called that? Great idea. :rolleyes:
 
The "Death Adder" from Down Under Knives.

I Googled it, thinking "no way". But there it was.
 
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