Where in the world are Moosez45 and DerekH?

Got an anonymous lead tonight. It was a pretty mysterious phone call, but apparently, Moose and Derek now have a ball washing business near a golf course in Nut Haven, Utah.
 
Guyon said:
Got an anonymous lead tonight. It was a pretty mysterious phone call, but apparently, Moose and Derek now have a ball washing business near a golf course in Nut Haven, Utah.
Click to expand...

I feel I should point out that it's a frisbee gold course.
 
Jonny1280 said:
Moose was heart stricken with grief after Derek ditched him for the circus.
Although Derek had grown famous in the band of trapeze artists known as The Flying Rodreguez's, Moose just couldn't shake his feeling of jealousy.
"If he can join a circus, then I can join a carnival!" Moose mused cleverly to himself.
So he put on his best pair of dirty 1980's LA Gears(with double laces), his mustard stained wife-beater, a pair of Daisy Dukes, and knocked out a few of his front teeth. He was ready.
Moose turned out to be a world class carny. But he felt a void in his heart...
He left the spotlight of the carnival to go in search of Derek.
On his way, he stopped in Detroit to pick up a man can of malt liquor.
And there, in a dirty ally, sat Derek. His purple tights were torn and tattered and missing many sequins...
"Derek?..." Whispered Moose in a soft melodic voice.
"Moose!" Screamed Derek jubilantly.
The two reunited in a warm bro hug for the ages.
"We need a vacation." Sighed Derek.
"Where should we go?" Asked Moose.
"I have family in Mexico." Derek said with a Latin accent.
"Sounds good. But what about the hurricane?" Belched Moose.
"No worries. I spent my trapeze fortune on these here pack mules. They can weather any storm. Hop on!!" Boomed Derek triumphantly.
Off they rode into the sunset. Galloping slowly towards the border with booze in hand and sombrero on head....

To be continued...
Click to expand...

Before the duranged duo made it 2 miles, their brawny pack mules collapsed from sheer exaustion...
Out of nowhere a beautiful Subaru pulled up next to them. As the driver door slowly opened, the pair heard angels singing followed by the Mission Impossible theme song...
It was Tradewater!!!
"We're saved!" Shouted Moose.
"It's Tradewater! He must be traveling back from his Greco Roman wrestling world championships." Said Derek while waxing his mustache.
"Here ya go boys! Compliments of The Gunyon!!" Tradewater screamed as he threw two large biscuits that hit Moose and Derek right in the face.
"See ya on Half Moon ridge ladies!" He said while he shot roman candles out of his window as the Outback speeded away like an old school Bat Mobile.
As Moose and Derek sat in the gutter enjoying their soft, flaky biscuits they pondered the meaning of Tradewaters visit.
"You know...we should probably start making our way to Becker East." Said Derek.
"Do you think anyone will remember us?" Asked Moose while doing his best Sean Connery impression.
"Of course they will!! We're Mods!! BwaHahahaa!! Now hop on the handlebars of this rusty womens 10 speed...We have a long ride my 'lil amigo."

To be continued...
 
Guyon said:
Got an anonymous lead tonight. It was a pretty mysterious phone call, but apparently, Moose and Derek now have a ball washing business near a golf course in Nut Haven, Utah.
Click to expand...

What does golf have to do with it?
 
Jonny1280 said:
Before the duranged duo made it 2 miles, their brawny pack mules collapsed from sheer exaustion...
Out of nowhere a beautiful Subaru pulled up next to them. As the driver door slowly opened, the pair heard angels singing followed by the Mission Impossible theme song...
It was Tradewater!!!
"We're saved!" Shouted Moose.
"It's Tradewater! He must be traveling back from his Greco Roman wrestling world championships." Said Derek while waxing his mustache.
"Here ya go boys! Compliments of The Gunyon!!" Tradewater screamed as he threw two large biscuits that hit Moose and Derek right in the face.
"See ya on Half Moon ridge ladies!" He said while he shot roman candles out of his window as the Outback speeded away like an old school Bat Mobile.
As Moose and Derek sat in the gutter enjoying their soft, flaky biscuits they pondered the meaning of Tradewaters visit.
"You know...we should probably start making our way to Becker East." Said Derek.
"Do you think anyone will remember us?" Asked Moose while doing his best Sean Connery impression.
"Of course they will!! We're Mods!! BwaHahahaa!! Now hop on the handlebars of this rusty womens 10 speed...We have a long ride my 'lil amigo."

To be continued...
Click to expand...

Totally legit.
 
Jonny1280 said:
Before the duranged duo made it 2 miles, their brawny pack mules collapsed from sheer exaustion...
Out of nowhere a beautiful Subaru pulled up next to them. As the driver door slowly opened, the pair heard angels singing followed by the Mission Impossible theme song...
It was Tradewater!!!
"We're saved!" Shouted Moose.
"It's Tradewater! He must be traveling back from his Greco Roman wrestling world championships." Said Derek while waxing his mustache.
"Here ya go boys! Compliments of The Gunyon!!" Tradewater screamed as he threw two large biscuits that hit Moose and Derek right in the face.
"See ya on Half Moon ridge ladies!" He said while he shot roman candles out of his window as the Outback speeded away like an old school Bat Mobile.
As Moose and Derek sat in the gutter enjoying their soft, flaky biscuits they pondered the meaning of Tradewaters visit.
"You know...we should probably start making our way to Becker East." Said Derek.
"Do you think anyone will remember us?" Asked Moose while doing his best Sean Connery impression.
"Of course they will!! We're Mods!! BwaHahahaa!! Now hop on the handlebars of this rusty womens 10 speed...We have a long ride my 'lil amigo."

To be continued...
Click to expand...

Can't wait for the next episode!
 
"Compliments of the Gunyon" had me crackin up. But seriously, that man is stingy with those biscuits. Otherwise this story is 100% accurate.
 
If the guy pretending to be D doesn't eventually resurface as an Uzbeki scammer or the actual D riding a lawn tractor with a mounted t-shirt cannon and a bitchin' lightning paint job, I'm not gonna be happy.

Or maybe he was traveling through Istanbul and thought it would be funny to paint his balls to match his pants and ride a floor buffer.
 
My current theory is that Moose, D, and Tradewater all ran off together to start a cumquat farm but then got distracted playing Pokémon Go.
 
bigghoss said:
My current theory is that Moose, D, and Tradewater all ran off together to start a cumquat farm but then got distracted playing Pokémon Go.
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Fervently trying to shove inanimate pigs into a quarter machine prize pokeball toy.
 
Last I heard, Moose and Derek teamed up with tradewater to start a rock trio called Toxic Masculinity.
Moose on bass, Derek on drums, trade on lead guitar and vocals. I think they're touring the Netherlands right now.
 
Guyon said:
Last I heard, Moose and Derek teamed up with tradewater to start a rock trio called Toxic Masculinity.
Moose on bass, Derek on drums, trade on lead guitar and vocals. I think they're touring the Netherlands right now.
Click to expand...

Whose netherlands are they "touring" this time?
 
none of them are pulling any weight, but their own ;)

good lord, it's like the early days :D
 
Guyon said:
Last I heard, Moose and Derek teamed up with tradewater to start a rock trio called Toxic Masculinity.
Moose on bass, Derek on drums, trade on lead guitar and vocals. I think they're touring the Netherlands right now.
Click to expand...

I heard is was a Dixie Chicks cover band.
 
...After a rousing Spring BeckerWest, the two were whooped. Moose and Derek were at each others throats.
The hobo life had made both men weary and quite tired of each other.
They parted ways with a soft embrace and a knowing smile that brought a tear to both mens eyes.
"I'll miss you compadré.." Said Derek, in his best Latin American accent.
"Go to hell." Replied Moose, as he wiped the brown dibble from his chin caused by the Skoal Bandits he was chewing.
After an awkward slow dance to Highway To The Danger Zone, the two walked away from each other.

Meanwhile, in a volcanic mega lair, Tradewater was planning something big.
He had equipped his Subaru Outback with side mounted rocket launchers, laser shooting headlights, and an oil slick feature straight from the popular arcade game Spy Hunter. He also had a smoker hooked up to his tow hitch. That way he could enjoy his delicious jerky anytime he wanted.
"Moose and Derek shall join me...or else!" He muttered creepily.
As the Outback burst forth from the spewing volcano, Tradewater could be heard from miles laughing maniacally.

Two heroes watched from a muddy goat cliff high above.
"I do believe our good friend Tradewater has turned into an evil villian." Said The Gunyon as he slowly savored a soft, flaky bisquit that he had drawn from a kydex holster.
"Si. Si. He's muy loco." Replied Bladito.
"I can't hear a damn word you're saying behind that Mexican wrestler mask." Snapped The Gunyon.
"Si. Si, senior The Gunyon. Senior Tradewater must be stopped at all costs."

Can our heroes stop Tradewater before he takes over the world?...
Will Moose and Derek find each other again American Tale style?...
Is The Gunyon's Colonel Sander's white suit and Bladito's Mexican wrestling singlet appropriate to wear in public?...
Find out on the next installment of Where in the World are Moosez45 and DerekH!!!
 
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