Abort, retry, ignore...

Gary W. Graley

“Imagination is more important than knowledge"
Knifemaker / Craftsman / Service Provider
Joined
Mar 2, 1999
Messages
26,341
Abort, Retry, Ignore?
A poem based on E. A. Poe's The Raven. (By Anonymous)​

Once upon a midnight dreary, fingers cramped and vision bleary,
System manuals piled high and wasted paper on the floor,
Longing for the warmth of bed sheets, still I sat there doing spreadsheets.
Having reached the bottom line I took a floppy from the drawer
I then invoked the SAVE command and waited for the disk to store,
Only this and nothing more.

Deep into the monitor peering, long I sat there wond'ring, fearing.
Doubting, while the disk kept churning, turning yet to churn some more.
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token.
"Save!" I said, "You cursed mother! Save my data from before!"
One thing did the phosphors answer, only this and nothing more,
Just, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

Was this some occult illusion, some maniacal intrusion?
These were choices undesired, ones I'd never faced before.
Carefully I weighed the choices as the disk made impish noises.
The cursor flashed, insistent, waiting, baiting me to type some more.
Clearly I must press a key, choosing one and nothing more,
From "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

With fingers pale and trembling, slowly toward the keyboard bending,
Longing for a happy ending, hoping all would be restored,
Praying for some guarantee, timidly, I pressed a key.
But on the screen there still persisted words appearing as before.
Ghastly grim they blinked and taunted, haunted, as my patience wore,
Saying "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

I tried to catch the chips off guard, and pressed again, but twice as hard.
I pleaded with the cursed machine: I begged and cried and then I swore.
Now in mighty desperation, trying random combinations,
Still there came the incantation, just as senseless as before.
Cursor blinking, angrily winking, blinking nonsense as before.
Reading, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

There I sat, distraught, exhausted, by my own machine accosted.
Getting up I turned away and paced across the office floor.
And then I saw a dreadful sight: a lightning bolt cut through the night.
A gasp of horror overtook me, shook me to my very core.
The lightning zapped my previous data, lost and gone forevermore.
Not even, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

To this day I do not know the place to which lost data go.
What demonic nether world is wrought where lost data will be stored,
Beyond the reach of mortal souls, beyond the ether, into black holes?
But sure as there's C, Pascal, Lotus, Ashton-Tate and more,
You will be one day be left to wander, lost on some Plutonian shore,
Pleading, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"​

:)
G2
 
Last edited:
Resurrected from the place
Where aborted files trace
Their unhappy end, to face
Oblivion.


How did I miss this the first time around ??!??
Just sent it to my family.
Thank you, Gary.
 
TOO Good. A feeling of hopelessness everyone - who has spent time in front of PC's as they have matured - has had at some time.

Great chuckle "early" Sun. morn.
 
You can always identify someone who worked in DOS. They save their work every few minutes because they got used to crashes. Every once in a while some young engineer at work screams because they lost a file they just spent 2-hours creating without any intermediate saves. The old farts just smile.
 
You're welcome guys, I thought it was cleverly written and there was an episode on the Simpsons that had James Earl Jones reciting "The Raven" so I can hear his voice saying the poem above, he has such a solid sounding voice ;)
G2
 
I can hear my own voice reciting it -- tense, desperate. :)
Like Frank said, those of us who worked in DOS remember ...
Word processing, I used to save constantly, after every line some jobs, every paragraph, at least.
 
I can hear my own voice reciting it -- tense, desperate. :)
Like Frank said, those of us who worked in DOS remember ...
Word processing, I used to save constantly, after every line some jobs, every paragraph, at least.

It does indeed remind me of the days when I was dragged against my will, back in the '80's (before Owlgore invented the interwebz), into a room full of computers. The first computing joke our instructor told us was about saving our work.

Satan, having failed in tempting Jesus, challenged him yet again. Winner take all in writing the complete history of the world on a computer. First to accurately finish and print wins. After hours of furious typing, the power flashed off, then back on. When the lights came back on, Jesus rebooted his computer and printed his writing. Satan lost his whole file and was banished to the netherworld once again. The moral being that Jesus SAVES. And Satan did not. I don't know how this could be retold with other religious charactors, but I believe it could be and the point would be the same. It was good enough that I remember it all these years later.
 
It's been a while since I've heard that joke.

I worked on CPM machines before I worked on DOS ones.
 
Back
Top