SALTY
Gold Member
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2000
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I posted this years ago in the Becker sub-forum and thought it may be of interest even today.
Forensic examination does, in fact, reveal Grivor lineage. Pre-historic Grivors are believed to have inhabited what is now post Ice Age North America. Because remnants of these rare, endangered, but not yet extinct species still have surviving progeny even to this day - the name Grivor may be a combination of the words GReat and survIVOR. On to what little is known about the Grivor:
These beasts were hairy, strong and smart. They used their superior intellect to fashion sharp objects from what natural resources presented themselves to the Grivors in their native and nomadic environs. The also were known to concoct beverages that seemingly enhanced their strength and intellect from grapes or grains through simple processes of fermentation or a more complicated process of boiling to make steam, then chilling to condense the steam. Grivors generally ambulated erect except for when too much of these concocted beverages were consumed. Less profound thinkers eventually used this steam that the Grivors wisely used to make beverages and amused themselves by directing the steam towards a turbine which would rotate/spin magnets near each other and make what is now referred to as "electricity." Whatever!
Back to the important stuff, the fermented beverages were sometimes either misplaced or confused with non-fermented liquids and run through the boiling - steaming - condensing process and consumed by the Grivors. This beverage made them especially stronger and smarter and also inspired profound dimensions of thought and imagination.
Grivors were aggressive consumers of meat. It is believed that the proteins and DNA in the meat they consumed (in earnest) attributed to their muscular abilities and hunter/predator ways. Killing, processing and eating the meat required implements to facilitate these tasks. Their superior intellect caused them to fashion what are now known as "knives" from stone, obsidian, and blends of carbons and other materials found naturally on earth. These blends of iron and other minerals were the beginnings, unknown to them at the time, of modern day "steel." Steel was used extensively in the killing and cutting of the animals they would eventually consume.
Striking their carbon steel knives against certain rocks allowed these amazing mammals to imitate the Sparks from Heaven or God Fire that they witnessed from the sky when weather suddenly changed. This led to fire and cooking of the meat. Then, one day, a Grivor, after consuming much cooked meat and much fermented (and distilled) beverages left his carbon steel knife in or near the fire until it was red hot. The Grivors feared that knife had become demon possessed and sought to kill it by holding it against a rock and smashing it repeatedly with another rock. It took a while but the redness of the knife eventually subsided but the knife was still too hot to handle without the tanned skin of their prey or other hand protection so they threw it in water and then later (and cautiously) retrieved it. The demons now having been thoroughly removed from the wayward Grivor's knife, it was returned to him.
Eventually the Grivors saw that this particular knife performed better than theirs and they wondered why. Through their superior intellect and imbibing of their favored beverages, they decided to take a random sampling of their knives, put those also into the fire until demon possessed and then perform an exorcism of sorts as they did with the first demon possessed Grivor's knife. When that random sample all performed better they put all of their knives through the same process.
History does not tell us how these Grivors evolved to where a precious few of their progeny exist today but while a hearty breed, they are endangered by the largely outnumbering rafts of competing, though lesser, species called "Sheeple."
Sheeple multiplied like weeds - invasive weeds that offer little value for food, shelter, implements or beverages. Though useless and invasive, they multiply in numbers and speak much - much too loudly and much too much. They abhor the killing of animals for food - unless someone else does the killing for them. They see knives, especially the exorcised ones surprisingly, as evil. That said, they readily seek the benefits of these evil implements when they need to have molecules separated for availing themselves their type of food (which comes in chemical based packaging contra to the Grivors' food which came in natural packaging) or medical procedures and the like. They speak voluminously about that which they know not and know not of that which we speak.
Sadly, the Grivors are losing ground in the modern day world, but thankfully the essence of these early wonders' DNA has been revealed in the handles of Becker Knives.
Forensic examination does, in fact, reveal Grivor lineage. Pre-historic Grivors are believed to have inhabited what is now post Ice Age North America. Because remnants of these rare, endangered, but not yet extinct species still have surviving progeny even to this day - the name Grivor may be a combination of the words GReat and survIVOR. On to what little is known about the Grivor:
These beasts were hairy, strong and smart. They used their superior intellect to fashion sharp objects from what natural resources presented themselves to the Grivors in their native and nomadic environs. The also were known to concoct beverages that seemingly enhanced their strength and intellect from grapes or grains through simple processes of fermentation or a more complicated process of boiling to make steam, then chilling to condense the steam. Grivors generally ambulated erect except for when too much of these concocted beverages were consumed. Less profound thinkers eventually used this steam that the Grivors wisely used to make beverages and amused themselves by directing the steam towards a turbine which would rotate/spin magnets near each other and make what is now referred to as "electricity." Whatever!
Back to the important stuff, the fermented beverages were sometimes either misplaced or confused with non-fermented liquids and run through the boiling - steaming - condensing process and consumed by the Grivors. This beverage made them especially stronger and smarter and also inspired profound dimensions of thought and imagination.
Grivors were aggressive consumers of meat. It is believed that the proteins and DNA in the meat they consumed (in earnest) attributed to their muscular abilities and hunter/predator ways. Killing, processing and eating the meat required implements to facilitate these tasks. Their superior intellect caused them to fashion what are now known as "knives" from stone, obsidian, and blends of carbons and other materials found naturally on earth. These blends of iron and other minerals were the beginnings, unknown to them at the time, of modern day "steel." Steel was used extensively in the killing and cutting of the animals they would eventually consume.
Striking their carbon steel knives against certain rocks allowed these amazing mammals to imitate the Sparks from Heaven or God Fire that they witnessed from the sky when weather suddenly changed. This led to fire and cooking of the meat. Then, one day, a Grivor, after consuming much cooked meat and much fermented (and distilled) beverages left his carbon steel knife in or near the fire until it was red hot. The Grivors feared that knife had become demon possessed and sought to kill it by holding it against a rock and smashing it repeatedly with another rock. It took a while but the redness of the knife eventually subsided but the knife was still too hot to handle without the tanned skin of their prey or other hand protection so they threw it in water and then later (and cautiously) retrieved it. The demons now having been thoroughly removed from the wayward Grivor's knife, it was returned to him.
Eventually the Grivors saw that this particular knife performed better than theirs and they wondered why. Through their superior intellect and imbibing of their favored beverages, they decided to take a random sampling of their knives, put those also into the fire until demon possessed and then perform an exorcism of sorts as they did with the first demon possessed Grivor's knife. When that random sample all performed better they put all of their knives through the same process.
History does not tell us how these Grivors evolved to where a precious few of their progeny exist today but while a hearty breed, they are endangered by the largely outnumbering rafts of competing, though lesser, species called "Sheeple."
Sheeple multiplied like weeds - invasive weeds that offer little value for food, shelter, implements or beverages. Though useless and invasive, they multiply in numbers and speak much - much too loudly and much too much. They abhor the killing of animals for food - unless someone else does the killing for them. They see knives, especially the exorcised ones surprisingly, as evil. That said, they readily seek the benefits of these evil implements when they need to have molecules separated for availing themselves their type of food (which comes in chemical based packaging contra to the Grivors' food which came in natural packaging) or medical procedures and the like. They speak voluminously about that which they know not and know not of that which we speak.
Sadly, the Grivors are losing ground in the modern day world, but thankfully the essence of these early wonders' DNA has been revealed in the handles of Becker Knives.
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