Wake was yesterday I blew off because it was for people who knew him from with is current wife and figured it was for them at that point and such. I just needed some time alone.
Today was the Fun-er-eal, we had the ceremony today and put him in the ground. I tossed in an OKC wraith knife in the grave, it was more for me and my cultural back ground, and then we did the final ceremony called for. And others said their final goodbyes who were finally able to make or wanted to say a final personal good bye in there own way. I was there mostly for the others who needed to say good bye. I myself came to terms of him going the way he wanted to go and was in control of his final moments in his life and comforted his wife on his last moments, so I was able to move on knowing he had his final wishes full filled. Don't know what to say any more on that. Yes it hurt and the surprise of him leaving us, but knowing he went in away he wanted to go so to speak, with no pain and clarity of mind in the arms of his most loved one. To me much of the pain of his loss was mitigated by my father leaving in such what I call a way he wanted to go. If you can understand what I'm saying.
Thanks every one for your heart felt wishes. I'll still feel the effects on and off for a while yet, but its not as painful as when I lost my mother and uncle in the same month.