I have never attempted to put together general survival kit in an Altoids can before. I know that it is a popular discussion topic on the great outdoors forum here, so I decided to give it a go.
The Scenario:
I am going on a long day hike to a favorite spot in a So. Cal oak forest to enjoy a fine lunch and a nap before coming back out on the same trail. I have a day pack loaded out with all the food, beverage, and comfort equipment necessary for the mid-point feast. Of course I have my Altoids tin survival kit in my back pocket “just-in-case.”
When I reach my destination, I leave the day pack on the trail at the picnic spot while I hike into the trees to find a spot to “fertilize the soil.” After that business is complete, I return to find a Rodent of Unusual Size standing menacingly over my pack. He is clearly willing to do fierce battle to claim the gourmet delights he smells inside. This vicious beast is also blocking my return path. I carefully consider my fight or flight options. I remember that I have a small folder in my survival tin, but it lacks the Triad-Lock that would certainly tip the battle in my favor. Given that disadvantage, I decided to trust in my navigation skills and survival kit to find another way back to civilization...(to be continued below.)
The survival kit lay-out:
Zip Lock Bag - for water collection
Aquatabs - to treat the water
Compass - for navigation
Jute Twine - for tinder material and lashing things
Firesteel - to set the tinder ablaze
Multi-Tool - primarily for the pliers, nail file and blade
Bandaids & Neosporin - to seal wounds and prevent heavy bloss loss
Fizz Stick Energy Packet - to mix with water
Altoids Tin - for storing everything and *cooking*
Wide Rubber Band - to keep the kit closed
Starbucks Instant Coffee Pack - essential for preventing mindset destroying caffeine withdrawal
The packed kit:
Closed kit with rubber band:
A close-up of the pliers I need to grab the hot Altoids base off the fire after heating water for my coffee.
I also discovered that the compass fits perfectly on the rubberband. With this on my wrist, I feel like a real professional “Operator.” (I am just not sure if it is the Soldier, Surgeon, or AT&T 411 variety.
)
I set-up a support base and rounded up some tinder to boil water for my essential coffee fix. The nail file on the multitool makes a good scraper.
After the little fire was going, I placed the Altoids base on the crossmember supports and filled it with water up to the hinge openings. I left it alone for a minute to select some small twigs to boost the flames. When I turn back to fire, I find to my horror that it is out because the Altoids base leaks water all over the place. This Epic Fail has cost me the hot coffee I need to survive.
With the nearest coffee shop many miles ahead over uncharted territory, I am now in an emergency situation. I take one deep breath and meditate for five seconds to re-establish my inner calm. I conclude that I have no choice but to go back and confront the Evil Rodent in a life or death battle for control of the trail.
Realizing I only have one chance to make this work, I use the remaining items in my survival kit to prepare for the battle. First I wipe down my face and hands with the Deep Woods towelette to get my stink on. I put the Band-Aids on my face to let him know that I have survived worse than he can inflict on me. I apply the Neosporin ointment to my cheekbones and eyebrows in MMA fighter fashion to prevent damaging cuts from his blows. I use the remaining jute twine to make a Rambo-esque headband. With the little blade out and ready to go, I understand how Frodo felt with only Sting to battle the Orcs. Mixing the energy drink and instant coffee with my remaining water, I am totally amped-up and ready for the confrontation.
Game face on.
Bring it on Rodent!
When I reach the picnic site, I find the Rodent fast asleep in my hammock after consuming all my food and drinking the whole bottle of Kosta Browne Pinot Noir I brought. My sense of fair play allowed me to accept his passive surrender as a victory as I head on down the trail to the nearest coffee shop for a strong hot brew.
The End.
Phil